Week 10....

So, is it Thanksgiving already? Time is flying by. Anyway, doing good. Smoking seems like it was in the past for me. I still have an occasional craving, but really, they are not crazy like they have been.
We got the 2 kittens back in September, and they have been sick. We have had them on medications, and when they seem to be getting better, they nose dive again. Quit a bit of money has been given to the vet, so we should be VIPs there! But within the last few weeks, my allergies have gone into overtime. I dont feel like I am able to enjoy me being smoke free. It's aggrivating! But they are soooooo cute! They have gone thru 4 name changes. The black one is now Edward Salem. Prior names: Romeo, George and Salem. They grey one is now Bella Gracie. Her prior names were: Riley, Gracie and now she is Bella Gracie, or "Bellie" for short. Amanda is reading "Twilight" and liked the names of the characters so much...so.
Anyway, they do seem to be getting better now, so lets hope they really are!

Wow...week 8 already!

Ok, so the cravings are dissappearing more rapidly now, and are less frequent. I ended up getting power tools with what ever money I had in my account. But hey, at least I can make things now. Besides, ham radio is kinda in a lull right now, so even if I did study and do everyhting, we're still lloking at spring time before I could get an antenna put up.

I heard from one of my co-workers this week, that she heard on the news, 'cuz u know the news is always right, that Chantix caused a person to contract diabetes. SO now the person is suing the makers of the drug. Hmmmm. Wonder if I can get diabetes from taking Chantix....But thats the truth! SHe heard it on the news. BAH!

Speaking of BAH. Anyone getting the Christmas Spirit yet? Last night at work I popped in the "Time Life Treasury of Christmas Music" CD. Think it's a little early? Nah...it's never too early! PEACE!

Day 36 YEA!!!

Day 36. Who'd-a-thunk it? Friday and saturday seemd really difficult for me, but I muttled through it. Gum is getting boring.
Got my check from Hartford today, and deposited it into the savings. It's like getting a free month! Over 300 now in the savings. Getting closer and closer. Now the big dilemma (heh...if this is a dilemma) buy used or save a little more and buy new? Gotta think on that one.
Last night, while I was talking about this, I kinda felt like I am doing the wrong thing. Like I shouldnt be focusing on saving my money for ham radio stuff. I dont know, I guess I feel guilty. I mean, there are others out there that are in far worse situations than I am.
Had Mandi's b-day on saturday. And if you are reading this that means I survived screaming loud 11-12 yo girls.......hmmphhhhh(scratch the head)......built a really great fire in the fire pit though. The following is a look into my thought process at the time: (verbal: spoken (mind: thoughts
Oh yeah. Fire! Let's make it bigger! (mind: Hey, grab that old piece of tree over there...put it in...cool....hmmmm, I didnt know sap could put out so much black smoke....ok...maybe that wasnt so smart....let's see...hmmm....ok....water...grab the hose....(verbal: "Ben, turn the water on when I say so..(Ben speaking)um....that way(as I point to my left)...turn it that way....yeah...the left....(mind:lefty-loosey.....)" back in the mind again: ok...dont put it all out...there...wow...thats alot of steam...ok...(verbal: "Shut it off now Ben"....(mind:...sure is muddy...ok...the thing is still burning....roll it out...yeah...the poker....ok...that was easy (verbal: 'Dad...you want me to stomp out the fire thats on the ground?" "Um, yeah..." (stomp stomp stomp)"Ok, it's out" "So's the log..." (mind: ok...wont do that again....whew....
That was just a small glimpse of what happened saturday night. Luckily, all the girls were inside doing their nails. None were looking. Not that I am aware of. So, I didnt look like a complete idiot. At least I dont think so...
Until next time........................ PEACE!

Day 25

** Please leave comments! I would love to read them! **
Hey;
Same old same old. The radio was sold, but thats ok. Gives me more incentive to save. I have an old retirement account from when I worked in Naperville that they stopped contributing to so I am going to cash that out (20% in taxes...ick)and throw that in the savings. Ok, well, Im going to go open the savings account now. Talk to ya later!

Day 21/Week 4

Hey, wow. Didnt think I would make it this far! Anyway, I can tell things are getting better. Cravings arent as rampid as they were, now just spurious. A couple of really strong ones the other day, but I went all night last night with only 1 craving. It came and went, just like all the others. Now for the big dilemma.....

I know I said I was saving up for ham radio stuff. SHannon got me a copy of an old magazine I used to get. It's called Wood, and is dedicated to woodworking. Hmmmmm. I built Ben's desk in 2 hours yesterday. But, I have a line on a radio for $150. Hmmmm.....

I have tools to do minimal woodworking.I can improvise on certain techniques.
I dont have my upgraded Ham Radio license.
I need to study and take a test to upgrade. Easy though.
I can buy the radio now, and maybe that will give me more incentive to study harder.
Hmmm.
Patience is in order here.
Hmmm.......(scratch chin.....belly's growling.....)
Dinner is in order here.....

Skipped a few days.....

SOrry I havent been active lately, crazy sleep schedule and all. Anyway, everything is going well, were are into day 20. Yes, the cravings exist still, but they dissipate rapidly once I redirect my thoughts. Work is still difficult for me. I figured if I can do this on the midnight shift, where 4 hours of sheer boredom will drive a person nuts, I should be able to handle everyday life....

Still very positive about this, and last night, as I was trying to nap, it occurred to me how really successful I have been! I think about all the things I will be able to do better, and the things I will be able to save up for....wow! Well, Im gunna log off for now. Hope everyone has a great day!

Day what? What number is this??? Where am I?

Ok, so I have started week 2. Day 8 maybe? Day 9? I dont know now, it's on the calendar but Im too lazy to look and count. It's officially my weekend, and I got a ton of stuff done today. Brakes on the Cavalier, grass mowed, both front and back. Poop scooped(Mandi said she couldnt do it...HA! Proved her wrong...um...wait...I think I got bamboozeled....little twerp!)Kids fed, dishes done. Bloggin....

So, now for the smoking thing. I had some difficult times last night at work. Mainly when I was sitting there doing nothing. I almost turned to my partner and ALMOST bummed a smoke from her. But, deep down, that little voice told me NO! DONT DO IT! YOU'LL RUIN ALL THAT YOU HAVE WORKED SO HARD FOR! Im glad I listened to that voice. Today, a couple of times I really wanted one. But I stuck it out, it lasted maybe 5 minutes each time, then I got busy doing something else. Is there a trend there? But the support Im getting at home is incredible. Tonight, after dinner I was 'Jones-in" again really bad. I sighed out loud, Mandi asked what was wrong and I told her. She jumped up sayin "Gum! Gum! Where's the gum???!!!!" I told her I was very thankful for her support. SHe said "No problem dad." I tell her what day Im on and she says "Woooo Hooooo......High Five!" (slap). Always makes me smile. I love everyone so dearly.........
Until next time....................................PEACE!!!!!

P.S. How many smokers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. THey cant concetrate that long enough without smoking...... Booooooo....bad joke...........boooooooooooooooooooo................."Get off the stage you idiot!"....... Sorry.....Im blaming the Chantix for that one..........

One week into it...

Brief note:
I am coming up on my weekend so I will write more later. Have to do the brakes on my car on wednesday. So far so good......

Start of day 7....

Day 6 went very well. I was surprised to notice that I really didnt have the urge to smoke. It was a nice relaxing day. The rest of the night went well also, being my first day back at work in over a week. Surprising, I didnt find myself wanting to take breaks, in fact I didnt take any(well, of course bathroom breaks...coffee you know.....)

Day 7:
Today I woke up at about 11:30am. Have been up ever since. Need to go get the kids today because of the rain. Trying to keep myself occupied with odds and ends. A few really strong cravings today. Like I was ready to walk into the garage and smoke....bizarre. Keep your fingers crossed, I dont want to give in now......

Day 5..Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Whew....testy. Cranky. Irritable. Grouchy. The kids have been awful today! Joking aside, they hav been trying my patience today. I have promised to buidl them desks out of a couple of 3 drawer chests we have had, and since I am using power tools, they cant help as much as they would like to. Amanda has helped a little more than Ben, but she is really shwoing an interest. Anyway, when she isnt helping she is walking around saying she is bored. Usually right around the time I start doing something. It's irritating.
Shan is home from work and is taking a nap. Then we are going to go to Wal Mart to get a few groceries. We'll see how the rest of the night goes......
Testy, grouchy, irritible............................................................

Fast forward to day #4......

Ok, so it's the 4th day. The last 3 have been tough, not crazy tough, but trying to say the least. Today, I felt like I could just give up at a moments notice. I dont know why, because I am still in the positivie frame of mind, and I am actually proud of myself of making it this far. Maybe it's the Chantix? But I would remind myself that I do not smoke anymore whenever I would get the craving, and then continue on. Shan has been a huge supporter, and is always curious as to how Im doing. In the past, she woulnt ask because trying to quit cold turkey would make me unbearable to live with. So she just would bring it up. Now, she doesnt have any fears of talking to me about it.
In the end(12 weeks total), I will be able to say that I have truly done it. I am also excited that the money spent on smokes is going towards a savings account, just for my ham radio stuff! I CANT WAIT!!!!! Until next time................

Becoming an "Ex"

Hello!
First entry in the blog here. I hope you all find this look into the realm of my dealings with smoking both funny and heartfelt. I hope to keep everyone posted on my day to day issues. Enjoy and God bless!